If you want to know who you are...

...as opposed to who you like to think you are, Keep an eye on where your feet take you.

--Frederich Beuchner

When I first heard this quote, some 45 years ago, I thought it was the coolest thing I had ever heard.  I was on a weird jag of collecting quotes, hoping to sound smarter than I was.  As time went on, I found that this really was true. In my wild days, I went to wild places. Now, in a more spiritual journey, I find myself more involved in church activities. and loving it.

But, if we take this quote and expand it to other aspect of our lives, we really do find out that we are not always who we like to think we are.

What I am about to say is not meant to condemn, but to provoke thought.  If your conscience is pricked it is NOT my fault.  I am not passing judgment on anyone else's mora code.  Just my own.

The first step in this analysis of our actions is the question: Who do I want to be?  Do I want to be a party girl? a nun? Do I want to be respected? trusted? Do I revel in the thought of being the villain in someone else's story, or the hero?  Do I want to be a good person? or evil? and by Whose standard?

The next step is to find the standard you want to live up to.  Often this is the hard part.  Other's standards can be difficult. Our own standards can be daunting.  Whose expectations are we comfortable failing? Do we have the grace and confidence to fail and not fall?

For me, the standard is the honest kind of love that isn't a warm fuzzy feeling, but active and honest. The kind of love that tells the hard truths, even if it means hurting someone's feelings.  I do try to be as gentle as possible when smacking people with hard truths.  

So, next thing we look at is what are we doing?  What actions do we engage in on a daily basis that align with our beliefs, convictions and philosophies?  Are we hypocrites?

I don't have your answers to these questions. Some days, I don't have my answers to these questions.  Many days, I fail so utterly that the best I can do is try again next time.

All I really know is that I'm pointed in the right direction.


Peace, Dudes.


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